I'm So Fat.

Happy Monday! 

Patrick and I took the MOST FUN mini-vacation to Marfa, TX for my 24th Birthday. We had an amazing time at El Cosmico and so many other fun, quirky spots, and I'll do a full recap soon, but I wanted to let you in on something first -

I felt so fat during our vacation. So fat. And the truth is, I've gained more weight in the last six months than I feel comfortable with, and it really bothers me. I know the reasons why I've gained weight - I've been busy, I've been stressed, and I haven't taken enough time to take care of myself. I don't know how to take enough time to take care of myself. I'm horrible at it, and I know that needs to change. But back to vacation...

So anyway, on Day 1 in Marfa, I just kept thinking how I hated not being able to take a vacation from the negative thoughts in my head. They just kept surfacing! I just kept feeling so fat, and ugly and bloated.

Then I received THE LIST - a list typed into my phone of things to do in Marfa, TX by some random (but lovely) guy at a Siamese concert. On the list, what saved me was this:

"Take More Pictures Than You Feel Comfortable With."

Well, I took this to heart. The number of pictures I felt comfortable with was a big fat zero. The number of pictures I took (um, actually that Patrick took) was about 100. And sure, I cringe at some of them, but I'm so glad that I took them. I had FUN taking them, I'm already having FUN looking back at them, and I know it's going to be FUN sharing them with you.

Marfa is the most quirky little town EVER and the people there are so accepting of travelers no matter who you are or where you're from. I hope they rubbed off on me. If I met someone in the street today, I hope it would go something like this:

Me: "Hi! I'm Elise. I'm feeling fat today, but I'm beginning a diet, and the sun is shining, and I'm happy!"

Random Person: "Hi. That was way too much information but, since you mentioned it, I'm feeling XYZ...(period-y, elated that Beyonce had twins, so over Monday, wishing it was 2020 already, etc.)"

Me: "It's fine you feel that way - it's great even!  Embrace it! And take more pictures today than you feel comfortable with. It helps fight the feelings. It really does".

Thanks for listening! On a more serious note, I'll have a post up soon about Tools of Titans and No Country for Old MenI read both of these books on my trip and they gave me HUGE insight into how to feel more comfortable in my own skin and my own life.

Stay tuned! 

Elise MatsonComment